thinking about writing about thinking

I've been spending a lot of time recently thinking about my online presence. The reality being, that I don't really have much of one. When I starting thinking about my own business seriously, I started to sensor myself online. I abandoned my old website and started afresh.

I wanted this site to be more of a reflection of what I find interesting in the world, because the reality was that most of what I loved about the "diy" and "craft" culture was the people, and the amazing things that they were creating.

But somewhere along the line, I feel like I've lost my voice. Inspired by this post, I just spent a good hour reading over my old blog. The blog I wrote between the ages of 26 (seriously?) and 29. I'm 33 now, and of course my voice has changed - that's inevitable. I'm less sad, but still not the most optimistic person you'll ever meet. I'm doing what I want to be doing - which I really struggled with back then - but I'm still not exactly where I want to be. When I started writing that blog, I always thought that at some point I would go back to it and cringe at my words. Mock my sentences. Belittle myself. But the opposite has happened. I find myself kind of missing that girl, in a way I never thought possible.

And it's not just because she had good hair and an amazing jacket.

Six years is not very much time, but in the internet realm, it kind of is. The internet has changed, adapted, become something incredibly amazing. And blogging has changed with it. I said to J the other day that everyone who blogs is trying to market something. And I think that's for the most part, true. I would be a hypocrite to say that I'm not doing it too. And I don't necessarily think this is a bad thing. Ideas are marketable, too. I feel inspired by and connect to hundreds of people every day who don't even know that I'm there (which is sad), and I know that this way of communication has helped so many people to achieve their dreams and make a real difference in the world (which is amazing).

I guess I'm bummed because I feel like my conversation with the world has changed. Things are still exciting. Sometimes things are still shit. And THAT'S what I think is missing - I think I need to talk more about who I am in this city, rather than just what's going on around me. Which, to be honest, I was kind of doing a bit of a piss-poor job of, anyway.

Montreal is amazing. Maybe, just maybe, even as amazing as New York.

So, welcome to my life here.

Picture above from Lilac Saloon.

1 comment:

Michelle said...

Hi Shannon, I've been following your blog quietly for a few months now. In response to your post, I just wanted to tell you that I've really enjoyed your writing on coucousalut. Maybe it's not the same voice as you had 5 years ago, but it's lovely and unique in its own way.

Best wishes for you and your business!